While We’re Here
Photo Credit: Santiago Lacarta
“We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love and then we return home.” ~ Indigenous Proverb
In alignment with my themes for May, this week’s musings blog is about overcoming adversity in the context of uncertainty. Change and disruption of old patterns seem to be dominating the collective experience. There continue to be ripple effects from Covid. Divisions around race, politics, gender and beliefs are increasing. Politicians are unpredictable. Wars are raging. The temptation for many of us is to retreat and cling to fear narratives we’ve convinced ourselves are truth. But I believe uncertainty is an opportunity for us to observe, learn, grow, and love.
In my experience, when we try to eradicate uncertainty it’s because we want to alleviate the stress that is activated by our natural fear response. But when we can lean into our discomfort and embrace the opportunity for growth, we find our resilience. From a place of active curiosity, we learn new ways of thinking. I believe one of the habits that get in our way is the propensity to look outward to the experts for answers instead of inward. This trend is only increasing, with media influencers advising us on every aspect of living, from what to eat to who to vote for.
I think a healthier response to change and uncertainty is to listen to your intuition for guidance by connecting to the Divine Intelligence that lives inside you. Your very essence. That’s what you need to access to make conscious choices that are in alignment with your values and purpose. Being open to change is an adaptive, forward-moving mindset that comes from within.
When we accept that knowledge and perceived truths are not static or consistent across time, we can respond to new information using critical thinking and problem solving skills. It is the fear of uncertainty that is so debilitating, not the uncertainty itself. Fear is the root vulnerability factor for anxiety and depression. Fear is a lack of trust in the process of life, in all its messiness.
I’ve written about how fear narratives keep us from being resourceful and embracing change, so today I’m taking a more positive and encouraging approach. I suggest the first step is to switch your focus from outcomes to processes. To illustrate my point, I’m going to share another personal and current challenge with my health that I’m working to find solutions for.
On Tuesday I had an appointment with my endocrinologist. I think the world of him and value his opinion as a highly educated expert in his field. He supports me with my attempts at managing up-and-down cycles in my blood sugar. He is aware that in thirty-five years, I haven’t been able to achieve consistent numbers. My experience of living with constantly changing blood sugars has caused more than one specialist to throw their hands up in defeat.
As Dr. Raizman has observed in the eighteen months I’ve been working with him, a shift of half a unit of insulin can create a dramatic drop or rise in my blood sugar. Stress affects me even more than insulin, food or exercise. And let’s face it, I’ve been under a heck of a lot of stress. When my blood sugar dips to dangerous lows, which right now is regular thing for me, I have to react quickly. To achieve the best results, I need a solid plan, yet my approach has to shift on almost a daily basis because of my sensitivity. I don’t fit into the statistical data, so what might be recognized as good practice for most diabetics often doesn’t work for me.
I’ve experimented with all kinds of treatment options, from needle therapy, insulin pumps and sensors, to diet, exercise, and stress reduction strategies. Nothing has produced the in-range outcomes cited as ideal for longevity and reducing complications. Ever. Currently, my A1C is up again, and while Dr. Raizman is encouraging me to go back on a sensor and insulin pump, I have little faith that it will improve the outcomes and it will likely increase my stress.
I’m following my own advice, staying open to my doctor’s ideas while going inward and listening to my heart. I hear a soft voice whispering to accept the uncertainty of my journey with diabetes. Whatever choices I make, they need to align with my spiritual belief of trusting the process of life. Science can’t illuminate the right path for me better than my own intuition.
I don’t believe it’s wise to give up my decision-making completely to technology. I want to be active in my management of the uncertainty each day brings, assessing all of the factors that affect my quality of life in every moment. I don’t see myself as a diabetic, but as a human being living with diabetes. It’s a big shift in focus that has me making choices that honour all aspects of my journey so I can live my best life while I’m here.
I refuse to allow fear narratives to cause me to retreat into despair, believing that if I don’t get my blood sugar in range I will end up having my legs amputated, on dialysis, blind, or dying from a stroke or heart attack. I don’t accept a victim a mentality. Whether it’s overcoming the challenges of diabetes or cancer, I’m living connected to my experience, not outcomes.
My heart calls me to accept the process of life and my spirit calls me to trust. Whatever happens, I will follow the path that feels right for me, regardless of the good intentions or advice of others. I trust God’s Divine intelligence will guide me. I believe in my ability to adapt in the face of uncertainty and to overcome adversity. As I walk the journey of my life, I will observe, learn, grow, and love with all of my heart before I return home.
I hope, dear reader, that wherever you are at this time, in this place, whatever your challenges with uncertainty and change, my musings bring you some comfort. I hope you feel encouraged to trust you will make good decisions, that you are adaptive and able to overcome adversity. I wish you well on your journey through the cycles and seasons of life, for all the time that you’re here.
COMING UP…
Books & Projects:
· All four of my books are available online at Amazon, Chapters-Indigo, and Barnes & Noble. You can also find them at select Chapters-Indigo and El Hombre de la Mancha bookstores.
· I am pursuing representation from a traditional publisher for my fifth literary fiction, a psychological drama that explores the complexities of mental illness and trauma. Stay in touch by signing up for my blog or following me on social media to find out when it will be published.
Reviews & Interviews:
· You can read, listen, or watch a large selection of reviews and interviews on my website.
Events:
· There are no events currently scheduled in my calendar.
YouTube Channel:
· Watch The Rogue Scorpion trailer.
· Watch The Holding trailer.
· Watch The Healing trailer.