I Made It!

Photo credit: Ramon Buçard

“Travel is about the gorgeous feeling of teetering in the unknown.” ~ Anthony Bourdain

For my regular readers, I apologize for missing last week’s post. I had just endured a two-day journey from Winnipeg to Toronto to Panama to Brazil, followed by full-on engagement, connecting with my family. Today I’m posting my final blog on August’s theme about stepping, leaping and hurling yourself outside your comfort zone. I’ll kick off September’s theme of seasons, cycles and transitions next week.

I’d imagined this final blog in the series would be the most compelling example of managing discomfort, yet when I finally sat down to write about my big travel adventure, I realized it hadn’t been nearly as remarkable as anticipated. In fact, each step of the journey seemed to unfold in an opposite energy, of flow. I’m going to share the story none-the-less, in the hopes that it will have you resonating with the gorgeous feeling of teetering in the unknown.

Mister drove me to the Winnipeg airport on Tuesday afternoon and accompanied me to the check-in. We weren’t certain whether my large suitcase stuffed full of presents for my family in Brazil, plus clothes for six weeks away, was within the weight limits. As it was, I was over by several kilograms, so I took out a bulky, thick hoodie and another sweater (for my last week in Toronto in October) and the kind check-in clerk was willing to let go the remaining kilo.

Relieved and grateful, Mister walked with me to deposit the heavy case on the luggage belt and kissed me goodbye. “Te le extrano, mi amor,” I whispered in his ear, one of my few treasured Spanish phrases still intact, which translates roughly to, “I miss you already, my love.” He wouldn’t be joining me for just a little over a week, and in that moment, it felt so far away. I blinked back tears and kissed him again before making my way to security.

As a person with Type I diabetes, I always have to endure extra discomfort during travel. The inevitable rigamarole of swabbing the icepacks necessary for my insulin and rummaging through my stash of Ziploc bags stuffed with medical paraphernalia. It isn’t a pleasant ordeal, but it’s one I’ve grown accustomed to and so it had no power to steal my joy. I tapped into the bliss I felt in anticipation of what my journey was leading me to and stayed at peace with the process.

The two hours and bit flight to Toronto seemed to pass in a flash. Before I knew it, I was standing at the luggage carousel, engaged in small talk with an extraverted stranger. At the exit I asked a security agent for directions to the Sheraton Gateway hotel and it turned out it was a mere two minute walk, in the same terminal. Check in was quick and efficient and soon I was in my room, clean and satisfactory to my tastes. I called Mister for a FaceTime before I turned out the light, then a brief, dreamy few hours rest before the next step on my journey.

Up before my alarm or courtesy call, a superpower I developed over nine years of international travel, I showered and was on my way to catch the train to Terminal One. At Copa Airlines a kind agent took on the task of my kiosk registration, but because of my e-visa I had to be seen by an agent at the counter. She plunked away at her keyboard and within minutes printed off boarding passes for both flights, no comment on the heavy luggage before tagging it all the way through to Brasilia. I was through Security and at the International E-gates by seven am. Boarding was in an hour, so I purchased some snacks that suit my dietary restrictions and a large coffee, then sent text messages and swirling hearts-around-the-head emoticons to Mister.

No longer able to afford the luxury of business, I chose the Goldilocks middle ground with a seat by the window in a premium economy seat for the six inches extra leg room. I was happy to discover an entertainment system, the idea of watching a movie during the five and half hour flight appealing. I gazed out the window at the tarmac, my head spinning with images of what waited just ahead—the intoxicating scent of babies, snuggles, and cuddles.

Soon after take-off I was served a complimentary turkey and vegetable omelette with fruit which was edible. I scrolled through and found a delightful movie, The Unbreakable Boy, which I can highly recommend. Based on a true, inspirational story, it had me in tears one minute, laughing the next. I read my book, listened to podcasts, dozed, and then before I knew it, the captain was announcing our descent into Panama. I spotted boats of all shapes and sizes in the ocean waters below and felt comforted by a place that I know, that for a brief time I called home.

At Tocumen airport in the brand new terminal, it was only a five minute walk to my connecting gate. I was enjoying the vibrant new space, in sharp contrast to the dark and dismal old terminal with horrid washroom facilities, when an oasis of palm trees and thatched roof tops on the third floor caught my eye. On a whim I decided to indulge in a glass of wine at the Vista bar. I sipped a delicious malbec whilst writing in my journal.

As I wrote, it was clear I had experienced very little of the stepping out of my comfort zone energy I had anticipated. I cautioned myself not to get too complacent because the next and final flight from Panama to Brasilia would be taking me to a part of the world I’d never been to before, teetering in the unknown. I was certain that, despite the evidence I’d collected— that I am a capable solo international traveller, this next step would surely hurl me into unease.

To my surprise, the Copa flight from Panama to Brasilia wasn’t even a quarter full! My upgrade was unnecessary, because there were no other travellers in my row and I had all three seats to myself. Also, the aircraft was a new Dreamliner B737-800, all sparkly clean and new, including advanced QR code entertainment technology. I watched another movie, The Prestige, which turned out I’d seen before, a long time ago, but I still enjoyed it. The meal of “beef” and rice was less than edible, but I had my stash of snacks to keep me going. I even managed to catch an hour of sleep before I heard the captain announce we were about to begin our descent.

We landed in Brasilia just after midnight. I was struck by the original architecture, the passage to the baggage collection running alongside an outside, windowed wall sprawling with green plants instead of an inner route through a crowded terminal. I followed the signs to the carousel, my bag one of the last to appear, but I was just grateful it made the long journey intact. The line at Customs was short and the Officer didn’t say a word, not even a hello or hola, but read through my travel documents, including my e-visa, stamped my passport, and pointed where to go.

I walked through the exit into the waiting area, and there was my son, sitting on a bench. My heart leapt into my throat and I croaked out a strangled, “Hi!” He stood up, so tall and handsome, and pulled me in close, me up on my tiptoes, for a big hug. Everything about him so familiar, yet different, because after all, he is a father now, and that changes you in extraordinary ways. We babbled in turns all the way to his car, then home to his condo in the early morning hours, the streets dark and quiet. A wait that had seemed too long to endure was now done and over. I made it! In the morning, my life would be forever altered when I held my grandson in my arms for the first time – but that story will come in next week’s blog about life transitions.

COMING UP…

Books & Projects:

·      All four of my books are available online at Amazon, Chapters-Indigo, and Barnes & Noble. You can also find them at select Chapters-Indigo and El Hombre de la Mancha bookstores.

·      I am still determined, pursuing representation from a traditional publisher for my fifth literary fiction, a psychological drama that explores the complexities of mental illness and trauma. Stay in touch by signing up for my blog or following me on social media to find out when it will be published.

Reviews & Interviews:

·      You can read, listen, or watch a large selection of reviews and interviews on my website.

Events:

·      There are no events currently scheduled in my calendar.

YouTube Channel:

·      Watch The Rogue Scorpion trailer.

·      Watch The Holding trailer.

·      Watch The Healing trailer.