Our Human Hearts
“My naam is Lynda, dit is my dogter, ons is van Kanada.” (My name is Lynda, this is my daughter, we are from Canada)
This month I’m reflecting on how my travel experiences have expanded my perspective. In today’s blog I’m writing about the month I spent in South Africa with my daughter in 2008. We made the long journey from Calgary to Cape Town to begin our volunteer experience with an organization called Cross-Cultural Solutions. They had provided us with all kinds of information before hand, but nothing prepared me for the emotional rollercoaster I was about to step onto.
When we arrived in Cape Town in the early morning hours of July, it was their winter; chilly and raining hard. Despite the information package provided by Cross Cultural Solutions, I held a deep-rooted and misguided perception that the entire continent of Africa was always hot. I was dressed in shorts and a sleeveless blouse. Luckily it was warm and cozy inside the shuttle van I’d booked ahead, and Zana, our driver, was lovely.
We arrived at Boulders Beach, the resort I’d chosen as our transition sanctuary, an hour later, greeted by penguins. They waddled about the grounds, a sound like a honking goose crossed with a barking seal, harsh on the ears even through closed windows. Shortly after Zana drove away we discovered the door to the lodge was locked, the blinds drawn. Stuck in the rain without shelter, we sat on the ice-cold wrought-iron chairs to wait.
Luckily it was only about an hour before the manager showed up and, seeing our distress, kindly agreed to bend the rules and check us in early. Our room was quaint, clean and comfortable. A warm bath soaked away our chills. We tumbled into bed and fell into the deep slumber of travellers. We awoke refreshed, delighted to see sunshine filtering into our room. We spent our first two days exploring and practicing our Afrikaans. The highlights for me were the boat trip to Seal Island and a hike of Cape Point and Good Hope.
At our Home Base in Cape Town we were shown to the modest but clean room we would share for the next three weeks. It was chilly at night with no furnace, and the lights kept going out due to some problem with the fuse. Luckily I packed a reading light. I would soon discover the long list of challenges was just beginning. I would also find out just how privileged I am.
My daughter and I were set to volunteer together at the same school, but while I loved the opportunity to work in a classroom setting, my daughter wasn’t so enamoured. When she listened to other volunteers talk about their work in an orphanage, it lit up her heart and she asked me if she could change. I resisted, afraid for my seventeen-year-old to be out of my sight in a foreign country, but she was persistent and eventually I decided to trust all would be well.
My three weeks at Eros School was as dichotomous as all my experiences of Cape Town, a city of contrasts if ever there was one. Every day I felt conflicting emotions. Surprise, elation, grief, overwhelm, discomfort, frustration, hope, dismay, discouraged— and broken hearted. The students were all from disadvantaged backgrounds, and many lived through major traumas.
One boy was in a car accident that took his parents and left him a disabled orphan. One girl was orphaned when her single mother overdosed. Another boy lived in a poor rural community and had to live in the school hostel, separated from his family, because it was too far away to travel each day. Another girl was in foster care after being removed from her home by social services because of sexual abuse by her father, uncle, and grandfather. She was seven years old.
It was heart wrenching, and at the same time, heart-warming because these children seemed so resilient and affectionate. Quick to smile, wanting to hold my hand, and giving me huge hugs. They loved the cassette tapes and books I’d brought with me from Canada. The curriculum, resources and educational philosophy were opposite to what I knew in Canada, with strict policies I would call old fashioned at best. Dawn Goosen, the teacher adviser I worked with, wisely told me, “These children, you need to be firm with them, ja, but it must be tempered with love.” My time at Eros taught me how love has the power to heal our human hearts.
Apartheid had only been outlawed fifteen years earlier and the impact of years of oppression could be felt everywhere we turned. When we weren’t at our volunteer placements, Cross Cultural Solutions provided us with educational experiences. We went to the Slave Lodge and District Six, participated in a healing drumming circle and took language lessons.
I thought a tour of an Afrikaans township, three families in one room with three beds, smaller than the room Tamara and I were sharing was a tough eye-opener until Shanty town. Corrugated metal shacks in tight rows by the thousands. No electricity, open fires for heat that too often turned into raging infernos of mass destruction. Our tour leader, who lived in a township herself, told us not to be sad because despite everything, her people were filled with hope and optimism for the future. She thanked us for being there and trying to make a difference.
On weekends volunteers broke off into different groups to explore. The day we went to Robben Island affected me profoundly. Our tour guide was an ex-inmate who was imprisoned when he was only seventeen years old, simply for being a member of PAC, a black activist movement. The same age as my daughter. I won’t share how he was tortured because it was so graphic and disturbing. But when he finished telling his story, he went on to share how meeting Nelson Mandela transformed his anger and desire for revenge to forgiveness. Mandela told him the best way to fight back was through education and to make the choice to be the change he longed for.
After our three weeks of volunteering ended, my daughter and I rode the Intercape bus from Cape Town to Port Elizabeth along the scenic Garden Route to Addo Elephant National Park. Our thatched roof rondavel had a patio and within minutes of sitting down we spotted our first elephant coming over the top of the hill. Soon we saw another, then another, until there were twenty elephants gathered, along with a courageous wart hog, by the water hole. We went on safari and saw other animals native to the area, but the highlight was when we saw a mother elephant nursing her baby, so close we could almost reach out and touch them. It was another unanticipated, heart-moment that Africa gifted us.
The connections I made with volunteers and program staff were another highlight of my time in Africa. Getting to know my daughter better was priceless. Our human hearts had been stretched to the limit. When my daughter saw the children’s cribs at the orphanage identified by numbers, she’d made name placemats for all them in her spare time. Through tears on the flight home, she asked me, “who will hold them now?” I didn’t have a good answer, but we hosted a traditional South African dinner and silent auction event to raise money to send back, knowing we couldn’t change the world, but we could be a part of the change we longed for, from our human hearts.
COMING UP…
Books & Projects:
· All four of my books are available online at Amazon, Chapters-Indigo, and Barnes & Noble. You can also find them at select Chapters-Indigo and El Hombre de la Mancha bookstores.
· I am pursuing representation from a traditional publisher for my fifth literary fiction, a psychological drama that explores the complexities of mental illness and trauma. Stay in touch by signing up for my blog or following me on social media to find out when it will be published.
Reviews & Interviews:
· You can read, listen, or watch a large selection of reviews and interviews on my website.
Events:
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YouTube Channel:
· Watch The Rogue Scorpion trailer.
· Watch The Holding trailer.
· Watch The Healing trailer.